I NEED to change..i just HATE myself!!?

I have an aunt, and my dad, mom, relatives, EVERYONE dislikes her because she is jealous, one day she's your best friend, the next your enemy, greedy, every single bad quality you can think of. ever since i was little i would do childish mean things to my little sister(things that a big sister does to her younger sister) and my parents would always tell me i'm like my aunt bc my little sister is like an angel and always took it w/o doing anything back.



my dad and mom both are pretty much saints too, and i am just like my aunt. i have NO idea how to stop being the jealous freak that i am, and my philosophy is you're born with your personality and you can't change it...



do you believe you can change yourself to be better??



and am i destined to be lonely forever?? (because ppl say don't go after the people who hurt you, and i always end up hurting everyone close to me unintentionally. every best friend i've ever had i've lost, and my current one is close to being lost too...HELP!I NEED to change..i just HATE myself!!?
Honey, take a deep breath and have hope here....you can change...it takes some work but I see in what you have told me you have a lot of pent up anger and there has been favortism in you family and that is very damaging to your self esteem, I bet if you look into your family chain you would find the reasons behind your aunts behaivors are also dealing with anger and no self esteem...you look in that mirror in the morning and have to deal with what you see...and the very fact that you do not like the mean and cruel streak is proof that they are not your nature...but your defense...I am going to give you a website that has several teachers to help you to become who you want to be and who will help you deal with the pain of favortism...your so called saints for parents have been pretty much jerks for putting labels on you and your sister good or bad...most of the time they had it done to them...and it sounds to me like the aunt was the unfavored one too.....anyway give yourself a chance here..check out this site..go to thesecret.tv then to secret gifts, then scroll down to the lady on the grass and play the video...say it out loud then after start exploring the site...it is awesome..you can get emails to your box everyday of some great people who like you did not like who they were or where they were at but chose to change and succeeded...I did the same..and I have a great life now..I still find the ugly in me raises its head once in a while...but now I know how to tame it...so have hope honey...love will prevail and life will get better...I NEED to change..i just HATE myself!!?
Okay we must be twins or something because I have the same problem! My attitude is changing because of my helper points- they are 2 close my eyes when ever I feel like hitting some1 or yelling at them and relax. It kills me when i have 2 say sorry or please stop but it has helped me stop being so rude to my little brother. It helps me to get away from my aunt sometimes and other people that aren't good examples ( it might be your case 2!) At 1 point of my life i felt as lonley as ever without any friends but now I got my friends back and new friends! Try my ideas and ur life will b going smoothly just like mine rite now!
Thats rough, im kind of going through the same thing, but i am fixing it, and its working. If you dont like yourself for being mean, then prove to your parents you can be nice, I KNOW I KNOW that tough with having siblings, i have two brothers! Im the only girl, and its hard, but you can prove to your parents theres a nice side of you.
You dont' want to be that type person. You have made the first step. We can all change. Since you really want to, I know you can. The next step is, love yourself. Start writing down some of your jealous thoughts and look back on them later. You may see how silly you are sometimes. My mother in law is just like your aunt and she has hurt so many people. Your parents were wrong to say you are just like her. Now prove them wrong. . .
pick up a book called energy medicine. it may help.



also your parents messedup by comparing you to your aunt, never do that if you want some one to change.



what you need to do is ask thoes close to you to tell you what they dislike. then take the smallest thing or things and focus on changing them. eventualy you can work your way to the larger problems.
You can change if you choose but it is hard work to begin with. In order to understand why you feel and behave as you do in order to change I recommend Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, or counselling arranged by your Doctor. You want always be lonely but it is wise to treat people as you wish to be treated. Decent, emotionally unhealthy people don't stick around to be mistreated by dysfunctional people or emoionally unhealthy people.
of course,you hold the key to your future just try,be a little less bitchy and spoilet and try to get along with everyone,you have to ask your self why you do these things.why hurt people?just calm down and ask if its worth hurting people today cus you or them mite not be here tomorrow.lifes to short to hurt people, and as the saying goes ';treat people the way you yourself would like to be treated';
I highly suggest that you talk to a therapist, it sounds like you may be experiencing some depression.