Did you try to change yourself for high school?

It's common that every summer people dream and try to change themselves so they'll be the people they once envied. They imagine themselves with a great body, better grades, or more friends. I'm going to be a freshman in high school when school starts back up, and I'm not going to know anybody, not even those I went to middle school with. That's a great chance for me to make myself a totally improved person, right? Wrong. I've been here before. I'll imagine something great for myself and then just end up disappointing myself.





I wanna know about how you've tried to change yourself, whether it was for high school or not. Did you succeed? Was the change for better, or did it make you lose touch with your real self?





What do you think about people doing these types of things?Did you try to change yourself for high school?
I was in your place about 6 years ago. I know this is long, but i think you'll get something out of it. It's not words of wisdom, just what i went through.





When i was a freshman, my older brother, John, was a senior and adored by everyone. He did so so in school but was on the varsity football and lacrosse team. He partied too much, drank a lot and went through girlfriends like toliet paper. I wasn't into any of that except the lacrosse part of it. and the two of us didn't really get along. I was too much of a ';goodie goodie'; for him as he called me.


I ended up having gym with a couple of my brother's friends. They noticed me and started talking to me, pushing me around in a joking way and started to accept me. In a matter of a mouth or two, i went from being just another freshman to ';John's kid brother';. I wanted to be different. I was tired of being a ';loser'; in my brothers eyes and saw this as a way to be like him.


I was accepted into a group of kids that were too old for me and I didn't realize what i was getting into. I went from being a great student to a so-so one like my brother. I stopped caring and started getting into trouble. I lost respect of those who mattered and gain it from those who didnt. I ended up making the lacrosse team even though i didn't earn it, just because my brother was captian. The two of us started to get along and i figured that was a good thing. Everything was handed to me and when he graduated in June 2003 and left for college, he left me with a reputation that i thought was something to be proud of.


Sophomore year I continued to act the way i had the previous year. I loved it. Parties all the time, driving all over the place, running from cops, tons of girls, no job, no worries etc. The summer before Junior year, my parents got tired of my behavior and got me 2 long hour working jobs. i started socializing with new kids, some whom i hadn't even considered talking to during the school year. It was then that I realized that the people I was friends with weren't really my friends and didn't care an ounce about me. I liked the new people i met, enjoyed their company and the fact that they didn't judge me right off the bat. I realized that I was tired of getting in trouble and decided to change for the better, not back to my old self before high school, but somewhere in the middle.


At the start of the school year, I forgot all about the whole changing idea. It was too hard to do. Once you earn a reputation, it stays with you and is hard to shake off. Teachers, students and parents aleady had their minds made up about me and I decided it was no use trying to change. I started dating this girl, Ashley, whom i had met over the summer, and though it may sound kind of fairy tale like or unrealistic, she helped me change. I loved her. It took a lot of work and a lot of growing up, but i slowly started to turn my life around. I started doing better in school, working a little harder and most of the time, making the right decisions. I had proved to myself that i could and be better person if i tried, but not yet to others.


In August 2005, summer before my senior year, Ashley told me she was pregnant. We had done it once, used protection, but sometimes things just happen. That was my wake up call. That news spread fast to everyone and people expected me to leave, not be involved, be of no help. Boy, were they wrong.


I went to every doctor appointment, shopped for furniture and clothing, went to classes, volunteered to help a lady with her infant down the street to get a feel for it, worked extra hours and had four jobs etc. I've never worked so hard in my entire life. My daughter, Rina, was born on Feb 3, 2006 of my senior year. I was 18 and Ashley and I struggled. We tried to juggle school, college apps and the baby, but became stressed out and overwhelmed. Ashley was killed in a car accident on April 17, 2006 driving home from work one evening. I was devestated. No words can express how I felt.


I had the choice to give Rina up for adoption to another family, turn her over to Ashley's parents who were moving to the other side of the country or take her in myself. I took her for myself. At that moment, I felt like an adult.


I graduated high school in May 2006, less than a month after Ashley past away. I was given numerous letters and awards from the principal and school board for my complete turn around and how proud they were of how much i had grown. I went to college, took out loans, got an appartment and raised my daughter. I'm still doing all of that now at the age of 19, almost 20, with the help of my parents and friends.


It's in the real world, after high school, that it matters who you are. High school is a joke on some level. Many people try to change and be someone totally different than themselves. Those are the people who miss out and don't enjoy high school as much as they should, who look back on it and say ';Man, i wish i hadn't done that.'; or ';i wish i studied harder.'; There are pleny of things i regret from high school. I regret the day i got my girlfriend pregnant but i don't regret the day i decided to raise Rina myself. That may not make that much sense, but if you think of it when youre older, it will.


Make friends with people who have the same morals, values and interests as you. Don't worry about who's popular, who's dating this guy, who's doing what. Be yourself and do your best. That's what matters.


Best wishes in high school. Enjoy the next four years, they're suppose to be the best of your life.





PatDid you try to change yourself for high school?
Not only did I try to change myself, I ended up with PTSD, acute recurring major depression, agoraphobia %26amp; dissociative personality disorder. It was bound to happen, either way, as I was merely stuck w/a bunch of total idiots. High school sucks.
I didnt have to try,,, it just happend, I just kept getting father and father away from what everyone else was concernd with,,, Themselves
I think people are much better off being themselves. What's the point of having more friends if you have to pretend to be someone you're not in order to have those friends? Better to hang out with friends you can be yourself with. After all, it's only high school -- it's not life.
I dont think its possible to change over a summer. You're always changing and over the years you will change. You will become what your values are and the things that you find important to you will define you slowly. During your teenage years you're trying to figure out what all the things you want to be are - and while you may be disappointed that you arent different over one summer, in a few years you will begin to see the fruits of your efforts.
im going to high skool in 1 year and im not change myself i am me just im lose some pounds lmao
well this is my freshmen year, and yes i did try to change myself for high school. in middle school, nobody liked me, they thought i was a dork, and that hurt, alot. so, when i went to high school, i thought that it was time to change. i tried to go with the flow and try fit in. it is not the best way to be, but once i got good friends i showed them the real me, and they like me even more. so yes it did turn out for the better. if you have a problem with this, good luck, i know you'll be fine!! :-)
Nothing wrong with dressing better, and trying to look better. You shouldnt need to change your personality too much, unless your a total social outcast. Just be chill, funny, and people will like you.





Some basic rules:


-never snitch


-don't suck up to teachers


-being involved is good, but dont be a try-hard, no one likes them.


-sports are good





A bunch of people, are gonna post all that stuff about be happy with who you are, and dont change, and blah blah blah.





But whatever, your choice. Just dont change too much.
I've always loved working on self improvement...





and yes, I've wanted to change myself to shock my old high school friends and make them say ';wow, look at her!';





however, I've learned that pleasing yourself is the best thing to do. there is NO WAY you will walk through the door and suddenly everyone will love and admire you and you will have the friends and boyfriend you dream of. so go with pleasing yourself. what don't you like about yourself. what do you want to improve for YOU? I found that improving my studying habits, dressing a little sexier and being more fashion conscious, getting involved in activities, not caring about what others think.. those things made ME the happiest. gave ME self confidence! and because I had self confidence, I had this feel about me that naturally attract people to me.


ever notice that at school you can become jealous of people who aren't miss popular but there's just something about them you admire? they have self confidence, and it's very attractive. It will help you a LOT more in the future than anything else you can do. so make sure you make yourself happy and not worry about anything else!





good luck!
The growth of tweens into young adults is a stress of many


minutes. Really the choices of a youth should be to study,


make lots and lots of friends, take part in positive improvement


whether its sports, music, band, dress parade, or spa all means


fulfilling that missing component you just mentioned. I was


driving a tank in the Peace corps, because the government


had backed the army and various troops out of emergency


fights with drug lords. I tamed around 250 mules and stock,


and helped build a panama area to stop smuggling and give


the farmers a better report. I preached in church, I walked


in Congressional filibusters, and interpreted at the United


Nations to raise the fight for freedom. These events will not


happen to you, though it is an area to be aware of for adult


status in the true patriot, or solid performer making a better


home for your families. Being like the quarterback, the artist,


the singer, dancer, gymnasts is a good ideal. This constant


rumor and fad area is not solid and hopefully with good friends


like yourself you can adjust to communicate love, faith, hope,


trust, and knowledge for a stronger team. Remember that


curriculum is a word to master all through college and top


training programs. Do what your good at, you love to do,


and helps you to share. http://www.familyfun.com
i changed myself i sure did. from boyish ugly duckling to a girly oh-now-you-want-to-talk-to-me? swan


never mentioned the past. and got brand new friends.


the change was for better, even though i lost touch with alot of the people i used to know. but i dont care. im not a clingy person anyways. i found my real self about a year later. and its still all-good, but that doesnt mean i'm my old self again. Pshhh..never again
Very good question. Many years ago when I started high school, I thought that changing myself would lead me to bigger and better things, more friends, and all of the ';good'; things in life. But I soon discovered that all of the people who were envied and indeed worshipped in my high school were, well, just egotistical jerks and extremely pathetic. Their interests were the heights of mediocrity and populism.


I could not wait to become an adult and get out of high school, and have never once looked back. And I did not need any medication or counseling to get over all the disappointment and frustration of those years.


Since then I've concentrated on living life on my own terms, doing no harm to anyone else but not hesitating to pursue my own interests in my own way. If people think of me as geeky or ultra-nerdy (which I am), they're entitled to their own opinions; but they are not otherwise entitled to a second's worth of consideration from me. I have a sweet life and a great job, and spend not one minute kowtowing to fashion and that which is popular.


You sound very articulate and bright. So I know you can understand what I mean when I say:


';To thine own self be true.';


';Live the life you love, and love the life you live.';
I think you should read Pat's story. He says it all and i had my daugther read it who will be starting high school soon.


Best wishes
you should change for yourself, to feel better about yourself, not for other people. If you change for other people to like you then you are doing it for the wrong reasons.





But its great if you want to improve your grades and or be healthier and have a better body, If it makes you feel better then there is nothing wrong with it.





Pat's story is INCREDIBLE, that is something to admire.





I am also going to start high school this year but things are different for me, This is what I do and it works for me: be yourself if some people don't like you then they aren't worth it you don't need friends like that. The real friends are the ones who like you for who you are.


Good luck in high school and remember what is really important and that is how well you do, after high school it's college ';the real world'; and what counts there is how you did in high school and your grades and scores on SAT's and what not. High school is different but don't think about it too much it's just something you have to do to reach college and starting a new life. Have fun while you are there and make the most of your high school years.





AND I'M PRETTY MUCH IN THE SAME SITUATION YOU ARE BECAUSE I WONT HAVE ANY MIDDLE SCHOOL FRIENDS WITH ME IN HIGH SCHOOL AND IT WILL BE TOUGH BUT I'LL MAKE NEW FRIENDS AND SO WILL YOU. THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, I'M SURE YOU WILL DO GREAT.